I always love the question, ‘so what brought you to Chicago, a job?’ and I sorta love responding with, ‘no, a boy’.
Some people are surprised, some think its cool. Being from the south, I had about a million people ask why I wasn’t demanding a rock before I hauled myself across the country, and that seriously annoyed me. Mostly because they never considered the fact that I wasn’t ready to get married yet either. And how on earth was I suppose to know if I wanted to marry this guy if I was sitting in Dallas while he was in Chicago?
Not to hate on long distance relationships, because there’s plenty of people who make it work and those whose situations don’t allow for them to be in the same city. But long distance just isn’t my thing. The four months we were apart when Rob initially moved were long enough. I hate talking on the phone and frankly I want to see my guy more than one weekend each month. So when he landed the job he’d been wanting for a long time, I was thrilled for him and excited that I was getting to check out a new city while I was in my twenties.
I wasn’t totally loving my job in Dallas, but was too nervous to quit a steady-paying job and jump into freelance, and the move to Chicago was such a blessing. It was just the push I needed to really get my business going. As excited as I was for all these new things and experiences, I won’t act like I wasn’t a bit scared. Then the worry set in. Who would I live with? What if we broke up? Would I make new girl friends? Would my new freelance biz support me? Would I die of hypothermia in the winter?
Obviously, any big change is bound to come with questions, hesitation and emotion. But once I found a roommate and made the move, I settled in quite nicely, and all those questions and worry pretty much disappeared. Since then, there hasn’t been a day that’s gone by that I haven’t thanked God for all the blessings and opportunities I’ve been given.
Over the holidays we played a family game and my sisters described me as brave. I’ll freely admit, that’s not how I see myself and was surprised at their answer. But looking back, I suppose this decision to pick up my life and move for a guy was definitely a bit brave.
My ‘brave’ decision has brought me so much, joy and happiness and I know this is exactly where I am suppose to be at this stage of my life. I have a hard time thinking that my business would have grown to what it is now if I had stayed in Dallas. I’m sure I wouldn’t have a sweet little puppy either (how crazy/depressing to think of my life without Oliver!).
So if you ever find yourself in a similar situation, I say just go with your gut. Forget the pressures from parents, friends and do what your heart’s telling you. Just make sure you and that guy are on the same page before quitting your job and packing your bags.
It’s so clear now that for me, this was totally the right decision and I wouldn’t trade it for anything. My relationship with Rob is even more amazing, I’ve made fabulous girlfriends (and new guy friends), my business supports me financially, and I bought a puffy coat to deal with that hypothermia. All in all, life is good, really really good. Whoever says moving for a guy isn’t cool, better think again.