The Ultimate Guide to Potty Training Boys

If you’ve been around here a while, you’ll know that I’m a mom to two boys and we’ve now potty trained both of them successfully. I can’t speak to girls since we haven’t had that experience, so my goal is that if you’re potty training boys, this guide will allow you to toilet train your boy with as little stress and frustration as possible.

If you’re ready to be done with dirty diapers, then get ready! It’s a lot of work, but a big accomplishment as a parent and for our little guys.

In the midst of potty-training my first, I remember someone sending me a message on day one, saying “I promise, there will be a day when you don’t wake up thinking about potty training,” and at the time it felt like that would never happen, but before you know it, it’s much easier!

Within a couple of weeks, they both were doing really well with very few to no accidents.

One maybe unpopular opinion is that it takes longer than 3 days.

So many books tout their three-day potty training method, but in our experience this popular method didn’t really work. It took 3 days to get the basics of it, not have them fully potty-trained.

From our experience, I found that day 3 was the turning point where things were starting to click. We weren’t having as many accidents, but it definitely takes longer than 3 days in my opinion to have them fully potty-trained.

So, if you and your child are ready, here’s how we potty trained boys successfully! I probably don’t have to say this, but I will anyway—every child is different and this is what worked for us, don’t get discouraged if it takes longer or you need to pivot your method. You know your kiddo best!

How to Potty Train a Boy

Potty Training Essentials

These were a few essentials that have served us very well over the years and I personally recommend. My kids especially loved the folding travel potty!

Get your Boys Comfortable with the Potty

Thankfully my oldest was regularly trying the potty at school because it was just part of what their teacher did, which I was really thankful for. And my second was used to it because he saw his brother using the potty.

You can start buy buying a potty seat for your toilet or even buying a small toilet though I have a personal aversion to those as it creates more work in my opinion.

Commit to Your Decision

When you decide to start, you need to commit to those days. It will likely get hard, frustrating and I bet you’ll hit a point where you want to just give in at some point during this, but DON’T DO IT!

Not only does it make the process longer for you, it’s also really confusing to their little bodies. Yes, you’ll likely be tired and miss some work, but when you’re done it’ll be so worth it. So commit and don’t go back!

Pick a Long Weekend to Potty Train

Like I said, I think it takes a minimum of 3 days to get a good foundation, but honestly, it takes longer. If you can potty train during a time where you’ll be home longer, even better. Holiday break, spring break, summer break—all great times, or if you’re just planning on doing a long weekend, pull them out of school and set that OOO for a couple of extra days.

A longer time frame will put less pressure on you and leave them with a much better foundation.

Roll Up the Rugs

We followed a method where they’re naked or pantless for the first 3 days, so I’d highly recommend you roll up your rugs for the week and avoid any worse messes. If you have carpet, try to stay in areas that are not carpeted or purchase carpet cleaner because accidents are all part of the process.

Teach them to Sit First

Start by having your boys sit for potty training success—standing is messy and harder. Even with my kids being older, standing still results in messes! When they’re little, sitting down and pushing down is the easiest and less messy way to teach them how to pee, plus if they suddenly feel the urge for a bowel movement, they’re already in the right place.

Create a Schedule

Those first few days are busy, and creatng a rough schedule of how often you’ll go sit and try is helpful to lessen the accidents, get them more comfrtoable sitting on the toilet and giving them plenty of opportunities to try.

The first day, we went every hour and made sure to bring books or toys so they felt comfortable and excited to go because they get bored of going in there and being asked to perform all the time.

Encourage Liquids

My youngest was much more stubborn and didn’t want eat or drink anything because he knew that it would make him go, so encouraging liquids is helpful because it will make them have to pee more which means more practice!

If they’re refusing water, try milk or even a no added sugar popsicle!

Only Focus on Daytime

When you’re toilet training, don’t even worry about naps or bedtime potty-training. Focus on one thing—daytime! These are two different skillsets and we don’t want to overwhelm their growing brains with adding in nighttime potty training.

Celebrate Big

When they go potty on the toilet, CELEBRATE BIG!! Let them know how exciting and how proud of them you are and how they should be proud of themselves. The potty training process isn’t easy so make a big deal when things click.

You don’t need to do this, but we found that little rewards after each successful “go” was really motivating for our kids. We’d do one “potty bean” which was just an M&M after a pee and two after a poop. Another idea would be a simple sticker charts. One of boys loved this, the other could care less, so know how your child will be motivated.

Once they had it down, we phased this out within a week or two.

Stay Positive

This is important for your own mindset and also for your kids during your potty training journey. If they see you getting frustrated and discouraged, they’re likely to feel the same. Keep your spirits high and take accidents with grace as they come. This will help keep them motivated and excited to learn this new skill.

Be Patient & Consistent

This might be the biggest and best tip I can offer you. I had a lot of people message me that they started trying then gave up, or their kid would be on the potty, but not poop.

Potty training a boy (or a girl) is hard, but just push through. It’s a huge adjustment to their routine, so give it some time. Going back to diapers will most likely just confuse them more, and when you try again, you may hit more resistance.

As for the holding of #2, the book we read said that most pediatricians aren’t going to bat an eye if a kid hasn’t pooped in a week. It’s okay if they hold it for a couple of days—both of our boys definitely did that, but eventually it happened!

If it’s really becoming a problem, you can mix some Miralax into their water or milk to help. This is non-habit-forming and isn’t a laxative like Dulcolax or a similar brand. We used Miralax for several months with our youngest to combat constipation at our doctor’s suggestion. Of course, talk with your own doctor before doing anything!

FAQS: Potty Training Tips

When to Start Potty Training a Boy?

With my oldest, we started at 28 months and with my youngest, we started at 29 months. Many books say you can start as young as 18 months, but I didn’t feel like they were ready at all that age.

My oldest was already trying the potty at school, so he seemed more ready, while my second boy took a little more convincing!

We also scheduled it around the times we knew we’d be at home—spring break and Christmas break.

What Book Did We Read?

Lots of friends suggested “Oh Crap” so I bought that one. I read part of it, Rob read none of it—whoops! I got antsy and just wanted to get started so I skipped over a few chapters to the one that was all about taking off the diaper and just went for it the next day.

I’m sure there are plenty of details that helped, but winging it also worked. With my second, I did not read any new books or re-read “Oh Crap”.

How Did We Know our Boys Were Ready?

So many people how to know gauge potty training readiness! Owen had been practicing at daycare and showing interest at home. I was planning on doing it around this time anyway. I would highly suggest doing it during a period of of time when you’ll be home or at least 3-5 days.

The book we read suggested potty training from 18-24 months and definitely before 3 years old. I have to agree. We had a few days of resistance and apparently that gets worse and worse the older they get, so if you’re on the fence, I’ll be your encouragement—JUST GO FOR IT!

Which Kind of Potty Did We Use?

We bought this potty seat. It’s not the greatest for potty training a boy, but it’s held up better than expected and my youngest, who is almost 4 still uses it on a daily basis. Plus, it was cheap!

I opted to not do the child-size potty—the kind that sits on the floor— for one reason, I didn’t want to clean it out every time they used it. I also worried that if they got used to that, it would be another transition to get them on the actual toilet.

At school, both boys were practicing on a real potty, a smaller one, but a real potty nonetheless, so we just went with that.

What Are We Doing for Nap Time & Nighttime?

We used nighttime diapers and eventually disposable training pants for nap time and bedtime. For awhile it was totally random—some days they’d wake up with a totally dry diaper, and other days, he wakes up super wet. I’ve heard from several of you that nighttime bladder control simply comes with time. Some kids pick up on it early, and some kids it takes longer.

With both boys, about two months in, they’d stopped peeing during their nap and at night, after a few weeks of tossing dry training pants we knew we were good to go. While I’m so grateful that our night training just happened on it’s own, know that it’s not usually that simple and can take longer—don’t get hung up on it!

Week 1 Recap & Lessons Learned

I wanted to include a day-by-day look at our progress so you can feel less alone. Every individual child will be different, but I find that if you go in with a solid game plan and a positive outlook, you’ll do great!

Day 1:

It’s a rough one guys. Like the book said, we wore no pants for the first few days. He asked for his diaper and pants several times and was a little confused and frustrated when we asked him to sit on the potty.

We rolled up the rugs the day before and thank goodness because he peed and pooped on the floor on day one. It was long and exhausting for everyone. Owen napped for 3 hours that day (normally does 2), haha!

During nap and bedtime, we still put a diaper on him.

Day 2:

Surprisingly, not bad! We did no pants again and didn’t have too many accidents. He didn’t go #2, and only had a small accident, but realized he was peeing, stopped and ran to the potty!

Day 3:

We put pants on for day 3, we probably could have gone one more day pant-less, but honestly it was COLD and I felt bad because he said he was cold. But, the pants were like a safety net and we had several accidents that day.

I can’t remember how many times he peed, but man, we went through a lot of pants. Even if he caught himself, he still had started in his pants. No #2 today either, I think he was holding it.

Day 4:

Similar to day 3, but only a couple of accidents. He was really resistant though. Every time I would ask him to go, he’d say no. Or, he’d get on the potty and immediately say, “all done mommy” before he even tried. It was frustrating.

This was the day (I think) that we decided to introduce a reward—the potty beans, we found these to be great positive reinforcement! He finally went #2, partially on the potty, but it started in his pants. GROSS, but progress!

Day 5:

Getting better! In the morning, he peed a little pee in his pants then realized he had to go, ran to the potty to finish. Later that day, we also went #2 on the potty. He ran around grabbing his bottom, saying “my booty hurting” and was really scared to get on there. Turns out toddlers are really scared to go poop, because they’re so used to the sensation of going in their diaper. It makes sense, even if it’s gross.

Day 6:

No accidents! No poops, but we still did some laundry because his aim was off and he missed the potty. Overall, we found that loose-fitting clothes made it easier for them to realize they had to go. Elastic waistbands are also a must because it’s easy for them to pull up and down.

Girls are probably easier, but boys you have to constantly remind them to push their penis down into the potty.

Day 7:

No pee accidents, but started to go #2 in his pants, again, and then made it to the potty.

Week 2

Week two was a turning point! We were still having some minor accidents—he’d occasionally start peeing in his pants before running to the potty and we were still having the #2 issue of starting in our pants. We’d made a ton of progress, but I still didn’t totally trust him.

The Turning Point

I can’t remember exactly what day we were on, but Owen and I were out for a walk and one block from home, he pooped in his pants. I had his scooter, helmet, water bottle and a 30-week pregnant belly so he walked home like that, haha! It’s easier to laugh looking back on it.

We got home and he was so upset! I’m sure you can imagine how big of a mess that made. Rob bathed him while I rinsed his clothes and started the laundry. At first I was laughing and then out of nowhere I started crying so hard. I’d had a lot of pent up emotions over the past week, and potty training boys is exhausting. I felt so much better after.

Despite how gross that experience was, I think it was the BEST thing that could have happened. He was so upset by it that he didn’t have another accident after!

I still do prompt him to go to the bathroom before we leave the house and before meals, nap and bed time, and if he hasn’t gone in a while, but for the most part, he runs in there himself.

I do think it’s important to keep prompting because toddlers get busy and don’t want to miss out on stuff, so they’ll hold it then have accidents.

If he’s doing something he doesn’t want to leave, I tell him that whatever he’s doing can either come with us, or will wait for him (if we’re watching a show). That usually does the trick!

Next Steps

According to this book, it takes kids’ brains a while to rewire and understand that underwear is not a diaper, so it suggests keeping them commando for about a month. With our first we were stuck at home during the pandemic so we stuck with this, but couldn’t for our second because our preschool didn’t allow for it, so he started wearing big-kid underwear shortly after. I bought him this set of cute boy underwear that he loves.

For outings, we bought this handy foldable toddler potty that we can bring anywhere and they felt more comfortable going on that vs. trying to hold them up over the potty.

I hope that I covered everything you were wondering about potty training a boy and gave you the motivation to just go for it! Life is so nice on the other side!

BTW, 8 tips for working from home with a toddler, and 7 tricks to teach kids manners.